Now the few peeps that know me ( i.e. the REAL me, not my societal persona), know that I question a shitload of things; indeed, if I were to describe my mental state, it’d be a perpetually smoking gun firing off round after round of armour-piercing question marks. I aaany case, I’ve found myself questioning the point of it all…. fuck, how cliche …. to be more accurate, I’ve found myself questioning the point of forming any human connections at all; not simply the false, superficial ones, but rather any at all. Why hold ANYONE in any sort of esteem? Why build up a tower of expectations or standards, only to have the structure toppled by those whom you had created it to honour? It just seems that the peeps you put a lot of stake into will often be the ones to thrust a stake through your heart; whether it be through betrayal, backbiting, crushing a dream or ideal you once held dear, or bolting the door to their abode and putting a giant, fuck-off ‘DO NOT ENTER’ sign up on the door (metaphorically speaking). Others – your loved ones – find some way of turning around and flipping you off, after you’ve approached them with open arms. In any case, I’m wondering why we insist on pricking ourselves on the nettles of networking when we know we’re gonna crawl away with blisters on the arse and plenty to bitch about. Are we that fucking oblivious to, or bored by our own sovereignty? In any case, I think I need a place for my head…..lata….
~MRDA~
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